The Importance of Reading Beyond Our Own Experiences

As we experience the lives of others, we understand them better, and we are better equipped to live in this diverse world and interact with its many beautiful people.

I admittedly live in a community that can be lacking in diversity. It’s one thing that small towns are regrettably lacking. But just because I have to go looking a little further doesn’t mean there isn’t a wealth of diverse experience within my reach. 

Reading a novel transports you into someone else’ head–like it literally places you in another individual’s perspective. Whether that person is real or fictitious, all thoughts and ideas germinate from real people with real feelings and real lives.

I know my experiences will never be the same as another’s, but I believe that at a deeper level we all have a desire to understand one another and reach out. 

This is the basis for Literature Therapy. The idea that reading develops empathy. Empathy for ourselves and others. As we experience the lives of others, we understand them better, and we are better equipped to live in this diverse world and interact with its many beautiful people.

Below are three of the beautiful books I read this week that gave me the experience to widen my perspective. 

The Poet X by Elizabeth Acevedo

Every now and then, I dress my thoughts in the clothing of a poem. Try to figure out if my world changes once I set down these words.

Elizabeth Acevedo in The Poet X

Xiomara’s Catholic mother, an immigrant from the Dominican Republic, has a plan for who her daughter is. X doesn’t know if she can still be devout to her mother’s beliefs. More than anything, what I saw in this book was a story of a girl searching for God. A girl absorbing a tradition that did not make sense to her and learning that it’s okay to question and find truth for yourself. 

Slay by Brittany Morris

Racism crops up in so many places, I should be used to it by now. But I shouldn’t have to be.

-Brittany Morris in Slay

Slay is the virtual reality gaming experience that seventeen-year-old Kiera Johnson has created. Slay is her safe haven. A space where she doesn’t have to exist as a minority. A place where she doesn’t have to constantly struggle with the complexities of being Black in White America. That is, until tragedy strikes from within Slay. 

A Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds

I'VE NEVER BEEN

in an        earthquake.
Don't        know if this was
even        close to how they
are,        but the ground
defi        nitely felt like
it o        pened up
and        ate me.

-Jason Reynolds in A Long Way Down

Will’s older brother, Shawn is dead. He was shot. All Will knows how to do is follow the rules. “Rule no. 3 Revenge / Do. / No matter what.” Once he decides to follow rule no. 3, Will steps onto an elevator where the past unfolds between each floor on the way down. 

Learning from Others

In our own lives we are limited to our own experiences and the experiences of those closest to us. As wide as those may be, there’s still so much more of the world around us, so many people we haven’t met, and such a range of emotions that we have yet to experience.

What’s the most classic story—the oldest story in the world?

The fight of good over evil. The hero’s journey. The defeat of a villain.

But what happens when you don’t know who the bad guy is?

Strange the Dreamer by Laini Taylor invites us into a story with precisely this predicament. With multiple narrators, Taylor invites us into the minds of two unlikely heroes, both of whom are taught to see the other as their greatest threat.

These varying perspectives present a fascinating story, a strong moral debate, and no shortage of adventure—but does it have something more to offer?

In the field of bibliotherapy (the process of providing therapeutic help through reading), one of the valued outcomes is a shift in perspective.

 As we’ve all experienced, stories take us places. They show us the world we’ve yet to see, and far off worlds that we will never see. They demonstrate the possible and the impossible. Perhaps that is what we love best about reading—the ability it gives us to go on grand adventures without ever leaving our bedroom.

But that’s not all it can do.

Reading also places us in circumstances and makes us feel emotions that we may never have experienced before. Reading gives us varying perspectives.

Keith Oatley described this process in his discussion on fiction.

 “People who read it improve their understanding of others. This effect is especially marked with literary fiction, which also enables people to change themselves. These effects are due partly to the process of engagement in stories, which includes making inferences and becoming emotionally involved, and partly to the contents of fiction, which include complex characters and circumstances that we might not encounter in daily life.”

Keith Oatley

This effect of varying our perspectives is more prominent in reading than in other activities, because the act of reading by itself requires more brain activity. It forces us to engage and interact in a way that television does not.

When we are used to oversimplified stories of good vs. evil, sometimes we try to overlay that onto reality. But the truth is, in reality there isn’t usually a good guy and a bad guy. People are more complicated than that. Sometimes two sides with different opinions are just that—two sides with different opinions. There isn’t always someone who is in the wrong. And there isn’t always someone who is in the right.

Strange the Dreamer challenges our ideas about who is the hero and who is the villain, by offering us the varying perspective of both sides.

In our own lives we are limited to our own experiences and the experiences of those closest to us. As wide as those may be, there’s still so much more of the world around us, so many people we haven’t met, and such a range of emotions that we have yet to experience. Without the valued experiences that reading gives us, we may never even realize our own limitations.

Books Bigger than the Bookshelf

Feelings are big—sometimes even enormous—taking up the entire room and consuming our lives. Feelings can have us running on air for days or weighing us down for weeks. They can be heavy and the load is real.

From my experience, how do you tackle big feelings? Well, with big books, of course. I’m not talking about physical size, or length, or word count. I’m talking about books that hit back at our big feelings with big ideas of their own.

Any booklover will tell you that books have feelings of their own—so whether you need a book to lift your spirits or cry on your shoulder—we’ve compiled a list of books with big feelings and big ideas. Here are our choices for books that are bigger than the bookshelf.

Content Warning: Like many big feelings, these books contain mature content and deal with big issues. Be sure to check for content before you read to know if these books are right for you.

For Young Adult Readers

We Are Okay by Nina LaCour and Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher

I place both these books in the same category because both of these books consumed me. I was completely sucked into their universe, and not just my head, my whole body with all the feelings that come with. Both of these books come with their own set of very heavy and very real emotions, including but not limited to loss, depression, suicide and assault. However, I had a very different experience when reading both of these books.

I have very fond feelings towards We Are Okay. Dealing with loss and feelings of depression, it takes you on a ride down a rather dark tunnel. However—and this is the reason I love this book—it brings you back full circle. It has the potential to be that story that lets you feel all the feelings you didn’t know you needed to feel. We Are Okay takes you down with Marin as she spirals, but then brings you right back up. It gives you the kind of closure that your heart craves. While reading, We Are Okay became this safe space to feel all the big feelings and experience the kind of resolution that we all secretly dream of and wish for from all books.

Thirteen Reasons Why also hits you over the head with its big feelings. But that’s just it, it hits you and it hits you hard. There’s nothing gentle about it and it has no intentions of being so. This book is about suicide and it’s a painful topic with a painful story. You know right from the start that once Hannah finishes telling her story that she is going to commit suicide. It’s an important subject to talk about, but consider your feelings before reading and make sure you can take the hit beforehand.

For More Mature Readers

The Cure for Death by Lightening by Gail Anderson-Dargatz

This book is huge. In fact, it’s what inspired this article. Days after reading this book, I still couldn’t wrap my head around what just happened. When I started reading this story, I had no context or knowledge of what I was walking into. I found myself wrapped up in the world of fifteen-year-old Beth, living in a small, Canadian town during World War II. Far from the war, she feels its effects in the absence of the young people enlisting and rationing of food. However, she is far more caught up in the Indian legends that she hears from the reserve, warning of Coyote, the demon-like creature that possesses men at their weakest and controls their actions.  

Beth’s feelings are not all-consuming, but pushed down on the pages as much as they are pushed down within herself as she deals with death, assault, abuse, mystery and legend. This is not a book that is comfortable or cathartic to read. It is, however, a book that is big.

Characters Who Experience Mental Illness

It’s hard to completely understand mental illness without experiencing it first hand. The joy of reading is that we have the ability to put ourselves into someone else’s head in a way that we never could otherwise.

When books highlight characters experiencing mental illness it helps us to understand and relate to mental illness in a new way. Here are three young adult books highlighting a character experiencing mental illness.

Aza Holmes from Turtles All the Way Down

In this book by John Green, Aza struggles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder as she goes on an adventure to help her friend investigate the disappearance of his father.

The story focuses around Aza’s experience with OCD. She is unable to stop her thoughts from spiralling around the thoughts of how many germs are in her body and the possible risks.

The International Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Foundation describes Aza’s struggle in their description of OCD. OCD involves a person experiencing obsessions—intrusive thoughts that trigger distressing feelings—and compulsions—the actions and behaviors engaged in to decrease the obsession.

T. Lillian Decker from When Elephants Fly

Written by Nancy Richardson Fischer, Lillian’s struggle with mental health stems from knowing that because of her family history she is at an increased risk to develop schizophrenia. Knowing that 18 to 30 is the most common age to develop schizophrenia, as Lillian approaches her 18th birthday she plans out the next twelve years of her life in order to avoid all stress and he possibility of developing schizophrenia.

While caught between the struggle to prevent her on-coming illness and her desire to live a full life, Lillian finds herself fighting for a baby elephant in a struggle that mirrors the fight for her own life.

Schizophrenia affects the way a person understands the world and their perception of reality, according to the Canadian Mental Health Association. It includes symptoms such as delusions, hallucinations, social withdrawal and disturbed thinking. In When Elephants Fly Lillian learns to come to terms with her encroaching illness and the symptoms which follow.

Craig Gilner from It’s Kind of a Funny Story

Based partly off the real life of author Ned Vizzini, the character of Craig suffers from depression. After experiencing suicidal thoughts Craig checks himself into a hospital for psychiatric care. During his time in the hospital Craig finds a new perspective on his priorities to improve his mental health.

One of the strengths of It’s Kind of a Funny Story is the very real emotions expressed by Craig. Ned Vizzini focuses not only on the emotional trials of depression but also describes the very real and very intense physical side effects of depression.

The physical side effects of depression are real and debilitating. According to the Mayo Clinic, side effects of depression include either insomnia or sleeping too much, lack of energy, reduced appetite and unexplained aches and pains. Craig’s journey demonstrates all aspects of depression and the on-going struggle that occurs throughout treatment.  

Books That Show Us We Don’t Need Permission to Live

Sometimes life gets stuck on repeat or starts to spiral down faster than we can recover from. When stuck in that spiral, the first step is just to remember that we have the ability to change our habits. We have control over our lives and it is a powerful thing.

The hardest part is when we can’t feel that power for ourselves. Feelings are slippery and it’s hard to remember a feeling that you aren’t currently feeling.

If you need to feel that power again, here are three young adult books that will allow you to experience what it feels like to grab your life and steer it in your own direction.

The Serpent King by Jeff Zenther

The Serpent King tells the story of three friends living in the rural south. Dill’s father, previous to being arrested, was a local religious leader who formed a cult-like following in their small town. He and his best friend Travis both feel trapped in this town with no hope for the future or chance of getting out. Their friend, Lydia, on the other hand, comes from a well-off family and is already planning her future beyond their hometown.

Dealing with depression, loss and feelings of worthlessness we follow Dill on his journey to discover the dignity in his life and the power that personal choice has.

I’ll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson

I’ll Give You the Sun jumps viewpoints and time frames between a set of twins at different times in their lives. We see the perspective of 14 year old Noah at a point in his life when everything is colourful and the world is just awakening for him. We then see the perspective from his twin sister Jude two years later after tragedy has altered both of their lives. The difference between the twins at 14 and 16 is night and day—and not for the better.

After seeing both of the characters lose themselves during the mysterious two year gap, it is empowering to follow them on their journey to find their way back to where they began, stronger for it.

They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera

Set in a world where a mysterious organization has developed the technology to accurately predict the exact day of a person’s death, Mateo and Rufus both live in a world where on the day of your death you receive a call at midnight informing you that it is your last day to live.

When timid Rufus and reckless Mateo’s paths cross on their last day to live, this story shows how powerful true connection can be in brining meaning into our lives. Both dealing with their approaching demise they each live an unexpected lifetime in their final day.

School Books that Made an Impact

Sometimes the only thing that can ruin a good read is when we’re forced to read it. For many of us books read in school are the only books we read growing up and for others they were a merely a distraction from what we really wanted to be reading.

But sometimes, in the midst of all them, there are a few books that are forced upon us that are too good for us not to fall in love with. After all, aren’t the books we read in school are supposed to be the greatest classics ancient and modern.

Today we’re searching for some of the best and most impactful books that we read in school.

Last year we put out a small survey asking what books from your schoolyears had the biggest impact on you.

You told us that you loved these books because it felt like they understood you, they aspired you, they made you appreciate things, and because they took your own experience and made you see the world differently. These are the top three we found.

To Kill a Mockingbird

To Kill a Mockingbird was written by Harper Lee and published in 1960. As one of the greatest classics of all time, To Kill a Mockingbird is the story of eight-year old Scout Finch. We get to see the world from her point of view, as she experiences life in the south with her brother, Jem and father, Atticus. It deals with issues of rape, racial inequality and injustice, as Scout’s dad defends a man accused of rape.

The Kite Runner

The Kite Runner, the most recent book to make our short list, was written by Khaled Hosseini in 2003. This book is the story of Amir recalling the events of his childhood in Afghanistan during a politically tumultuous time. This heavy story deals with intense subject matter such as sexual assault at the same time as, what Hosseini describes the focus of the story as, the father-son relationship.

Where the Red Fern Grows

Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls was published in 1961. This classic children’s novel is, as the subtitle suggests, a story of two dogs and a boy. This heart wrenching tale is the story of Billy Coleman, a young boy who works hard to earn his own hunting dogs and the adventures that they go through together. This coming of age story teaches the meaning of friendship and loyalty.